therewingbeblog

Wings of All Kinds

2011-07-30T21:59:00.000-07:00

Wingers,

It has truly been too long. Last night I threw a bachelor party for fellow wing-man Andy Menchal. Miraculously among all the items consumed by the 13 man roster none of the items were wings. So moving forward I can either write a laudatory post about Kelments cheddar filled brats or we can discuss the behavior of 13 dudes after a tailgate party, a Brewer game, and a couple pitchers of Conejitos margaritas. Well, we all know about the quality of sausage that this city has to offer (pause) soooooo... Fast forward to the end of the night my friends and I were "getting rebellion" at the scrip club (Solid Gold). At one point I believe I actually told a stripper "You are the greatest of all time." Meanwhile my friend Sam was in the process of injuring his hand by playing our new favorite game that involves punching a machine really hard which in turn tells you how tough you are. My friend put up career numbers against the punch machine, but his technique was a little off and his stint on the 15 day DL began today despite the X-rays coming back negative. After praising the Michael Jordan of exotic dancing, and attempting to fist fight Mike G who threw me headfirst into the wall. I got onto my bicycle and attempted to ride to my house with my good friend Jon Kraft in tow. The details are fuzzy to say the least, but I probably fell off my bike a good 20 times.

Okay So I guess I've got to talk about wings somewhere's in here. So recently I hit up the Deli Deal at Beans and Barley. For those of you who don't know about this, every hot food item in the deli at Beans and Barley becomes half price after 8:30pm. Not only is the food half price, but once you go often enough you'll become very acquainted with all of the deli deal creepers like myself who go in there on the regular. A couple days ago I went half-price burrito hunting, which yielded disappointing results, but there were a good amount of lemon-ginger chicken wings which had the price slashed. Being that they were available I felt obligated to buy a dozen. I promptly went home and got to wingin, and I must say, these non-conventional wings were pretty damn good. Another good thing about them was that the flavor lended itself well to healthy smothering of Frank's red hot.

And A quick travel wing piece. My brother lives in West Palm Beach Florida. While I engaged myself in a battle with the world on Friday night, he was doing a little bit of the same in Key West, and probably 10fold. Anyhow, last time I visited WPB my brother took me to a joint called The Thirsty Turtle. REALLY GOOD WINGS!! This was a traditional wing very similar to Leff's Lucky town here in Milwaukee. There was an ample amount of heat, and the outside was crispy in texture. The actual preparation of the chicken was among the best I've had. Like every bar in Florida the Thirsty Turtle is located in a strip mall (not scrip club) in Juno Beach.

Formal evaluations below

Solid Gold
813 S 1st St
Milwaukee, WI 53204-1816
Did not eat the wings, but I'm sure I would have given them the same editorial treatment as I did the strippers and Kelments Sausages in my cognitive state.
http://www.solidgold-milwaukee.com/Solid%20Gold%20Menu.html

Beans and Barley
1901 E. North Ave, Milwaukee, WI 53202
3/5 wings (but definitely not the food that you should base your opinion of the restaurant off of).

The Thirsty Turtle
13981 US Highway 1, Juno Beach, FL 33408
4.5/5 wings (FOR REAL!)

Wingin from the Womb

2009-03-02T08:34:00.000-08:00

Typically this blog is dedicated to the criticism of Buffalo Wings and tales of frivolity from our youth (and other times when we were clearly "Too old for this shit"). But the TWBB crew have decided to dip into another pool of academia for which we are completely incapable: Child rearing. When my good friend and winger/poser blogger Andy Menchal announced to Milwaukee's wing squad that he was having a little boy, we were all touched. But it wasn't until our last wing experience, that I became completely taken with the whole thing. Andy had told me earlier that day that he was going to miss wing day for a ultrasound. Needless to say I was already emotionally charged about being a man down. He later informed me that he was in fact going to make it, bringing the mother of his child to be, and asked me if that was alright?? Bear in mind that normally you would have to report weeks in advance if you have a request of this nature, and then it has to be run through this entire bureaucratic entanglement. But I reminded Andy that he was also bringing another dude, a very little dude.

Being back in school I have actually been exposed to a number of pieces of literature on the topics of breastfeeding, child birthing, and other early mothering techniques. But I am frankly shocked to inform you, that I have not come across so much as a brochure on the effects pre-natal winging. Since we only have one baby to work with, some academics may refute this piece of research as conjecture, but I believe our findings will prove to be important. For our first test we visited Barnacle Buds (Now open in the winter months!). The team was myself, Menchal, Cortney, Lonnie, Big Mike (a new staple winger), and of course our guest who has yet to be named. Cortney informed me that we were actually at the point in her pregnancy (about 4-5 months) when their child could actually begin to taste foods. Despite my expertise, I was unaware of this fact. Never the less, this was perfect timing. The Buffalo wings to the adults were pretty good!! Though only offered in one variety on the menu, the staff allowed us to order them at various levels of spice. I think the chef took some creative license here, as no one batch of wings tasted quite like another. They were a solid unbreaded wing, and sauced heavily with a traditional Buffalo Sauce with an unconventional hint of sweetness. The mediums proved to be the best option. Not because the hots were too spicy, but because the medium I believe were probably the house recipe and best in flavor. As we discussed them, our new winger kicked in approval, and I'm not ashamed to say I was truly moved.

Totally unrelated (my typical transitional genius), we have discovered a top 5 level wing in Milwaukee. Leff's Luckytown in Wauwatosa satisfied a 10 man wing team early last month. We were unanimously enamored with their brand of "ass kickin" wing and pretty much every other flavor that they offered. The "Ass Kickin" (pictured above) was the hottest on the menu. While these were delicious, they are far too hot for one winger to take down an entire order without ruining his/her insides (and certainly the rest of the day). The wings are in fact breaded with a healthy amount of sauce and spice on the outside (a wing style highly favored by Adam Loeb). These will not disappoint. Major Goolsby.. Watch your back!!

Here's the wing-down!!

Barnacle Bud's

www.barnacle-buds.com

3.5/5 wings

1955 S Hilbert St
Milwaukee, WI 53207
(414) 481-9974

Leff's Lucky Town

www.leffs.com

4.5/5 WINGS!!!

7208 W State St
Milwaukee, WI 53213
(414) 258-9886

The Future Menchal

Callin it Right now: Astrophysicist or better!!

Trading Places

2009-01-14T08:55:00.000-08:00

Hello all, I know its been quite a while, but my research in the winging to be had out here in Philly has actually been bearing some fruit.

First up - The Royal Tavern

This place has some wings that are absolutely fantastic. First I have to tell you about the place, now for everyone from Milwaukee I hope this description both offends and illuminates. Imagine a restaurant inhabited by people with a love of single speed bicycles, beards, irony, and both expensive and cheap varieties of beer. Also, imagine a menu consisting of somewhat interesting food items and a daily list of specials with clever ironic names. Let me guess, a little establishment called The Comet comes to mind. Now - and I don't want to blow anyone's mind too hard here - imagine that the food actually arrives in under an hour, and the said ironically named specials are quite tasty. That is The Royal Tavern in a nutshell.

Being in a luxury beer fueled adventurous mood I decided to order the sampler platter consisting of equal portions of the following flavors: buffalo, chipotle barbecue, and mango habanero. Let me tell you, all three flavors are amazing, even the barbecue. These wings come unbreaded and amply sauced without being sloppy. They also come with pickled daikon - an innovative substitute for the common celery garnish, carrots, and a sauce I was quite shocked to find out about. Get this, the brilliant kitchen staff managed to combine the two staple wing dipping sauces into one. These wings came with a Gorgonzola Ranch Sauce. Now I know this could be considered herecy by some wing purists, but seriously, you must try it. Oh and this is for Mr. Alonso, they sell pabst for $2 a bottle here, and its great lurking territory.

Final Rating: 4 out of 5 wings

Royal Tavern
937 East Passyunk Ave
Philadelphia, PA
215-389-6694

www.theroyaltavern.com

Wing-dings: The Font

2008-12-16T12:24:00.000-08:00

My friends and Wingers alike. Therewingbeblog has taken 2 major hits this last couple of weeks. The first is numerous threats from the staff of assoutsince.blogspot.com to change our status here to ass out. Recognizing the permanence of such a status suffered by the likes of Beck, The Crunchwrap, and the dude that threw his shoes at GWB, I have decided to try to save TWBB from this irreparable fate. The second major blow comes as our editor and chief: Josh is leaving Milwaukee to pursue Cheesesteak research in Philadelphia. While his qualifications are more than adequate for this line of work, I fear that this topic has been rehashed many times. Hopefully this will motivate the 2 other founding members: Menchal and Lonnie to educate the world about wings in the greater Milwaukee area, however I will not put a great stake in this. In addition we have added an Asian Correspondent: Mike Gee, to review flavors not familiar to our palettes, such as Thai, Sweet and Spicy etc..

Getting down to Brass Tax..

Though we have not been blogging, fear not, because we have been winging. To play "catch up" I am going to review the wings of my entire neighborhood, and incorporate it with a true holiday story which occurred the night before Thanksgiving 2 years ago.

Our travels today brought us to a location called Black and White. The wings, while having an original flavor were pretty middle of the road. Their signature "B&W" sauce was delicious to Mike Gee, but confusing to the rest of us. Their Buffalo sauce, was a lesser Griabaldi/Magoo style wing. In their defense they said they were available hotter. In any event the wings were no substitution for the former establishment located in the Black and White space. El Chico Zuma was the premier spot in Milwaukee to ensure that the rest of your body felt as miserable as your head upon waking up after a night of drinking on North Ave. Though I don't claim to be any kind of Shitty Burrito critic, I don't know if Milwaukee can deal with the loss of El Chico and Atomic records within the same time frame.

On that faithful night 2 years ago I did something else to ensure the equal misery for the rest of my body. After a night of drinking and winging with Lonnie and Mike at G-Daddy's BBC (probably the best wings on North Ave: very large/tender/ and well spiced classic style buffalo wing- but Lonnie does not approve of them), it was bar time, and everybody flooded into the cold street on North Ave. As we ventured to Mike's car on Prospect, we were drunk (Mike was not) and giddy, on one of the biggest "Going out nights" of the year. In my state I walked onto Prospect Ave. and failed to notice the White Lexus barreling down at me. As he hit his brakes I braced myself. According to Mike I flew up in the air and landed on the guy's hood. He gets out of his car and says "I just fucking hit you with my car." Mike G and Eric said it was the most insane thing they ever saw. I stood up and told the guy in the Lexus, who seemed to be equally intoxicated, to get lost. He and the hot blond in shotgun reprimanded me while I repeatedly asked Mike and Lonnie "How awesome did that look?" The couple then realized it was probably best to flea the scene which had attracted many bystanders at this point.

After a separate night with similar results my friend Adam and I stumbled into La Piazza: another North Ave haunt. At the time we probably thought we "Looked very awesome" shoveling wings down our gullets. But much like the wings themselves, upon further review there was nothing awesome about the way we felt the next day. I should add that there is currently a post on Craigslist with the opportunity to buy into this business for $60,000. If you choose to partner in this venture, please contact Therewingbeblog upon a decision to reformulate the wing sauce.

Black and White
1814 E. North Ave.
Milwaukee, WI 53202
2.5/5 wings

G-Daddy's Bradford Beach Club
2022 E North Ave
Milwaukee, WI 53202
3/5 wings (and usually very affordable)
1.5/5 wings according to Eric Alonso

La Piazza
1504 E North Ave
Milwaukee, WI 53202
5/5 wings (in Adam's and my state)
2/5 wings in reality

Hooligans
2017 E North Ave
Milwaukee, WI 53202
2.5/5 wings (but too expensive for wings)
(sorry I didn't incorporate this into the blog, but I have no stories about this place that don't end with my brother severing part of a finger).

Next weeks blog: Dock o' The Bay and Incidental Winging
(including details on a 10 year High School reunion complete with pictures for Faythe)

Return of the Wing!!!!!

2008-10-08T18:26:00.000-07:00

So, it has been quite a long time since I have kept you informed about Milwaukee's wing establishments. Part of that is my laziness, I also have been absent for a few of the more recent wing days. I will say this about some of my recent winging, Big Alke's was shit, Magoo's is the jam, and there's no point in me even discussing my opinions on music (see Loeb's remarks about Beck below). This week, we tried a new spot called The Irish Pub. I know, the name makes one a bit suspect. According to those who got the tip on this place, they were rumored to have 25 cent wing day on Tuesday, which was true, but we were unable to get this deal. Apparently we had the right day, just not the right time. The 25 cent wings are available only from 3-6 with the purchase of a beer. Now, the beer purchase is not what caused us the problem. We all would have gladly indulged in a noon beer for cheap wings. Remember, we really don't have what some people might call a "normal" work day. Maybe Loeb, but I have my suspicions about what that kid does all day. I just know from years of experience a lot of errands are usually involved.

Enough rambling, and on to what you're really interested in. The Irish Pub had only one sauce option which was a Whiskey Buffalo Sauce. I liked that they didn't fuck around with other flavors that just wouldn't be any good. No BBQ, which I must say is the most difficult wing flavor to master, and no ill fated attempts coming from the Asian flavor palette. A proper BBQ wing is quite tasty, but there must be absolutely no margin for error. I can honestly say that 95% of wings with this sauce are either okay or garbage. But that 5% that get done right are spectacular. Anyway, since I obviously did not think I had done enough rambling thus far, lets get back on track here. The wings were amply sauced and lightly breaded, and started off pretty tasty. Good heat, good flavor, nice meaty wings. Unfortunately after about 4-3 wings (I should note none of us ate fewer than 7-8) they got kind of stale. The sauce got the wings a bit soggy. This was the downfall of this place. A properly prepared wing platter should stay tasty from the first wing to the last. All in all, not a bad wing not that great of a wing, definitely not one wing to rule them all. I do think they would be a great option with a happy hour beer on a Tuesday.

Rating: 3 out of 5 wings

The Irish Pub
124 N. Water Street
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
(414) 225-9400

Big Alke's, The New Joint, And Some of our Other Worthless Opinions

2008-09-03T18:40:00.000-07:00

Let's keep this one real formal like. So our latest wing experience brought us to Bigalke's Sports bar out on 7th and Layton that was clearly a Ponderosa in its previous life. In addition to our normal team of Wing Experts/Lotharios we had our friends Adam and Bob in tow. The wings are available breaded and unbreaded which is a plus. The sauce pretty traditional with nothing particularly great about it. With the team of half a dozen we managed to veer from the topic at hand: wings (if you can believe that) to discuss another topic:

90's Alternative: and this is what we figured out (Proceed with Caution here; once every body threw in their two cents we had about 8 fifty):

Alice In Chains:

Me- Will entertain the idea that Dirt is kind of a good album

Bob- Became a fan after Layne Staley's successor, Some black dude, joined the band whom he saw perform live with the band.

Some Dude Adam saw speak who writes for Rolling Stone- Layne Staley's Death did not necessarily send a wave through the rock world, but maybe a ripple.

Eric, Josh and Menchal- Stayin out of this one

Nirvana:

Bob- In Utero is shitty (rape me is an especially shitty song), but Nevermind is Flawless

Adam- Unplugged in New York is the only good album they ever put out. "They waited their whole career to play that one show."

Menchal- In Utero is in fact good. So is Nevermind but the Song Polly sucks, and Territorial Pissings is a great name for a song. Incesticide Sucks except for the covers.

Bob and Menchal- Rape me is a shitty song. Sliver is a good song.

Me- Aero Zepplin is a great song (also in retrospect nobody brought up Bleach... interesting).

Josh and Lonnie- Stayin out of this one.

Rage Against The Machine and Red Hot Chili Peppers:

Eric (Lonnie)- If you go back and listen to that first record, its a piece of shit. The Red Hot Chili Pepper's are heinous (no exceptions).

Josh- The First Rage Record is the only good record. Because of negative past experiences he does not care for the Chili Peppers

Me- I celebrate Rage's entire catalog, but have to concede to Lonnie a little bit about the first Record.

Menchal- Jon Frusciante is a modern day George Harrison.

Adam- Is Evil Empire Rage Against the Machine's "One Hot Minute?"

Bob- "One Hot Minute is the only good Chili Peppers album."

Adam, Menchal, and I: Blood Sugar Sex Magic is a great album.

There's more on these two bands that I can't remember, and I'm sure I've fucked up some of who liked what. Any how....

Beck

Josh- Never been a huge fan

Lonnie- Stayin out of it

Menchal- Loves Guero. Really Likes the New one.

Me: I like it all (much like wings in general, easier to please than my compatriots)

Bob- (On the new record) Its like Gnarls Barkley with Beck singing instead of Cee-Lo- Bullshit.

Adam- "That dude's been ass out since Odelay"

We also covered The Bases on Mudhoney, Soundgarden, and maybe even entertained the notion of discussing Screaming Trees. I'm sure somebody made a crack about Tad's "Inhaler" album (probably me or Menchal).

If you actually read all that I apologize. But before we're finished here I need the attention of the most inquisitive wing minds. We have discovered what maybe the best wings in Milwaukee thus far (but don't say that to Josh, it makes him irate). Magoo's Bar in grill will now be patronized by the Therewingbebloggers on the regular. I was tipped to this joint by a big gentleman that works for KISS FM. When I told that to Menchal he said "That's the best lead we've ever gotten." And it was (Bob informed me that it is now acceptable to begin sentences with "And," but I'm still skeptical). What makes these wings so good is that the hottest wings available are not a novelty. They have the exact amount of spice that a really spicy wing should have. They are NOT breaded, proper size, with a traditional wing flavor in a higher echelon than most dives around this City. The Magoo wing maybe the best wing I've had in the greater Milwaukee area, and I encourage you to go balls to the wall and order the hottest wing they have to offer.

Magoo's Bar & Grill- an emphatic 4.5/5 wings!!
8911 W National Ave.
Milwaukee
414-329-1477

Bigalke's Sports Bar and Grill- a regular 2.5/5 wings
3300 S 27th
Milwaukee
414-649-0159

Beck- That Dude's been ass out since Odelay.

Country Thunder, The Confederacy, Elsa's and Points East Pub

2008-07-30T19:05:00.000-07:00

So Wingers,

Josh has really been the heart an soul of therewingbeblog, and I'm not going to try to steal any of his Thunder, but I am going to take a cue from his format. Wingday has had some issues recently mostly motivational, but some forces beyond our Control.

One such week I was at a festival called Country Thunder (for work OBVIOUSLY!!) in Twin Lakes WI. Very far from Wingday and pretty horrible on all other counts. The previous week our Florida correspondent and my brother: Toby Silverman was in town and we attempted a wingday at Milwaukee's Elsa's, who informed us that they don't serve wings until after 3pm. I don't think they understood how reputable TWBB was becoming in the world of food criticism.

Now the only way I can link these 2 stories (and probably not seamlessly) is to tell a story from an experience I had at another festival with a similar contingent to Country Thunder. 4 years ago, I was working for Camel Cigarettes, and we spent all day at Ozz-Fest at Alpine Valley. Aside from having an excellent soundtrack for winging there were many other things Ozz-Fest had to offer. One such service was a team of artists who painted abdomens, for all the women who decided it was too hot for shirts and bras. Many women took advantage of this service, as it was very hot out.

I noticed one such Woman standing in line to obtain free cigarettes for me. She was by far the most attractive woman I saw that day, which really is not saying much. If you've ever been to OzzFest you know what I mean. As she got nearer to me I realized she actually had the confederate flag adorning her impressive upper half. When she finally reached me, the only piece of chit chat I could muster was: "So are you Southern?"

She replied: "No I just want everybody to know how racist I am!"

Impressively I gathered.

At Country Thunder the Stars and Bars were just as popular. The most incredible display of it was about 8 guys in a pickup truck driving to the fest. One was waving the flag while his buddy held a 2 by 4. Hardly a sight a jew wants to miss Wingday for.

What I'm getting at here is Elsa's may be a great looking venue and the burger I had instead of wings might have been spectacular. But much like that gorgeous racist: If you have heinously ignorant beliefs like Wings aren't a lunch food, it doesn't really matter does it??

For the sake of getting an actual wing review in here I'm gonna make this short. After another cancellation of Wingday today mostly due to me working an event in Sheboygan hungover from my birthday last night. talking to the Budweiser fucking Clydesdales, Josh and I "persevered" and had a quick wingday at Points East Pub when I got back. He had been before, I had not. These wings are really fucking good. My kind of wing: no bredding, fairly dry, and ample spice. Similar to Club Girabaldi, but not quite as good in my opinion, better in Josh's.

Elsa's: We implore you to rethink your policies.

Country Thunder: Too many policies to rethink

Points East Pub- 4/5 wings
1501 N Jackson St
Milwaukee, WI 53202
(414) 277-0122

Wingiam Ho's

2008-06-20T14:45:00.000-07:00

This weeks wing day took an interesting turn. I was texting Silverman about where to wing and we were out of fresh ideas. He suggested Harry's Bar and Grill in Shorewood. Unsure of whether they have wings on the menu or not (We'll let you know as soon as we find out, we have been too lazy to further research this issue) I remember having seen a sign in front of William Ho's which happens to be across the street.

Here's a rundown of the mornings text communications:

Josh: We winging?

Eric: I can't today. Gotta wait for the internet guy to come between 1 and 3

Josh: Fuck man, make Purvis do it!

Silverman : Yes sir. But Lonnie can't. Where to??

Josh: Don't care, any ideas?

At this point I decide to just call Silverman, he suggests Harry's, and I tell him about the sign in front of William Ho's. I express some apprehension toward winging at a chinese joint, and Silverman declares: "That's our job man, the public needs to know." Point: Silverman.

We head to the spot and discover not only does this place have wings, but there is also a $6.95 linch buffet. If you know me and Silverman, you are aware that not getting the buffet was simply not an option. We sit down, and finally hear from Menchal who will be joining us this afternoon. Silverman decides that our best course of action is to order one order of wings for the table and we'll get the buffet. We wait about 10 minutes for Menchal, and decide the hell with being polite, we are going to start eating. I do have to admit that the impetus for such ungentlemanly behavior is that we saw an employee come out of the kitchen with a tub of skewered chicken and dump it into the skewered chicken buffet pan. At this moment Silverman simply declares: "That's our cue man." Point: Silverman

Menchal arrives about the time we are finishing our first round of china buffet. The wings arrive about 5 minutes later. The wings are pretty tasty, especially considering the location. The breading is a little heavy, but the sauce is not bad. It has a bit of a kick to it, and a pretty decent flavor. The wings were ample as well. The wings do not come with celery or any side sauces however. I found this a bit disappointing.

Ratings:

Wings: 2.5 out of 5 wings

Lunch Buffet: Suprisingly good, but I haven't developed a rating system for chinese buffet yet

William Ho's
3524 N. Oakland Avenue
Milwaukee, WI 53211
414-963-9781
www.williamhos.net

Public Wingemies

2008-06-13T12:23:00.000-07:00

This week's wing day tale provides an answer to a very ridiculous question......How can Michael Mann possibly be connected with Wing Day?

Oddly enough, the fiasco he created almost ruined what has become my favorite weekly activity. If you haven't been keeping up with current events the film Public Enemies is filming here in Milwaukee. Well, one of the locations chosen just happens to be my apartment building. I had received notice that some areas of my block would not be available for resident parking so I park on a block I had understood to still be available. I wake up Wednesday morning unhappy that I have to work at 8 in the morning with Wing Day being the one reason I don't feel like shooting myself. I head over to where my car had been parked the night before. I see the spot I was sure my car had been in was no empty. Because of the fucking film shooting in my building my car had been towed. I had no way to get to MATC (South Campus, which is by the airport) for work, and my ability to even make Wing Day was now in jeopardy.

After a few calls I finally wrangle my roommate into giving me a ride to the impound lot, where I will now spend $150 and 2 hours dealing with getting my car liberated. While waiting for the slow semi-retards to get my car out of the lot I make some phone calls to my landlord and the production company who is responsible for said impound lot adventure. I finally get my first good news..... Universal Studios will be reimbursing me for the ticket and impound fees. I am now officially part of the budget for a major motion picture.

I get the car liberated and head over to Kelly's Bleachers for the day's wingery. I must say, they make a fairly good wing. No heavy breading (Silverman hates the heavy breading), decent sauce, and a very ample wing. The sauce was a decent classic buffalo style sauce, but in my not so humble opinion a little salty, and the hot were not as hot as I would have liked. On the plus side, the wings were huge and impressively meaty. Also, the whole Wing Day team was in attendance, and Hugh Masterson decided to join us. That fuck got nachos however, and despite my informing him that this was not nacho day, the man could not be convinced to deviate.

I left Kelly's satisfied with my wing experience, went to my office to get some work done, and then headed back to my apartment. Now, when I left this morning there were some trucks occupying the space cleared by the previous nights towing, but now my neighborhood was a fucking circus. I had no idea it took 100 people standing around to make a film. Only 10 people seemed to be working at any one time, everyone else appeared paid to look after things that weren't headed anywhere. There were also easily 300 people across the street camped out watching the whole ordeal. Keep in mind that Johnny Depp and Christian Bale are starring in the film, so I imagine they were camped out to see them. I also happen to live on the 1st floor, which I am informed is now a set for the film, so I can't even get from the door of the building to my apartment without having to go past at least a dozen people walking around talking on cell phones (maybe that is what film people do at work).

I head back outside to walk my dog Herman (who is a bit crazy) and unaware of this at the time, will finally get to exact a small bit of revenge for the morning's fiasco. I walk over to the curb to look at the crowd amassed across the street and a white Land Rover pulls up. I am maybe three feet away from this car when out steps Michael Mann himself. Being that my dog is a bit crazy, and is a bit stressed with all of the commotion, he decides this is a perfect time to start barking and freaking out. Yes, and I swear this is not bullshit, my dog decides to freak out at Micheal Mann, who looks at the crazy dog for a second, glares at me, and then heads over to a catering tent to grab a cup of coffee.

Later that night I got to see Mr. Mann again and I even got so see Johnny Depp. Turns out when he was coming in the building to shoot residents were told to clear the hallways, but we could leave the door to the apartment open. My roommate and I decided to hang out just inside the door to our apartment so we could catch a glimpse, and sure enough we got to see Johnny Depp waiting for the elevator to the apartment they were shooting in. He looked over at us, gave a quick wave, and that was it.

Overall Ratings

Kelly's Bleachers: 3 out of 5 wings

Johnny Depp: Good looking man in person, but shorter than I had thought

Michael Mann: He better get me my check with a quickness

Kelly's Bleachers
5218 W Bluemound Rd
Milwaukee, WI 53208
414.258.9837
www.kellysbleachers.net

Paltry Poultry

2008-05-30T08:10:00.001-07:00

Being a holiday weekend and all, we decided to have an impromptu session on Memorial day. We chose this spot Water Buffalo on the recommendation of our buddy Max. The four regulars were there, and we also had our Chicago correspondent Sam in attendance. I arrived a bit late to see that Menchal and the gentle dipper were already seated. Being that this was a gorgeous day, I decided that sitting inside was just not going to cut it and did a little finagling to get us an outdoor table. The new table we got was fantastic. Out at the end of a row of seating overlooking the riverwalk and the Milwaukee river. As Silverman and Sam arrived we were all thinking that this wing day was most definitely starting off on the right foot. Eric, however, did not enjoy this new table much. He had some issues with the elements this fine afternoon. Somehow the wind managed to blow his drink over a couple of times. I'm not sure he really enjoys outdoor winging, but we all have have our things I guess.

We commenced the ordering, starting off with an order of breaded wings, and grilled wings, both with hot sauce. The options for method of preparation were a nice menu feature. The wings however were not all that impressive. The breaded wings were decent, and the breading was not too heavy. The sauce however was not horribly impressive. Classic "Red Hot" style flavor, but not as hot as I would have liked. The grilled wings were a similar experience. Additionally the wings were not all that ample. There was a severe lack of meat on some of the wings. As stated by Menchal "I can't even tell the difference between this (uneaten) wing, and the one you just finished." One very nice touch was the small bunch of red grapes included with the wings. After the appetizer of wings, we order the entree of, you guessed it, more wings. There was another round of the same, and an order of grilled wings with barbecue sauce. I'm not usually a fan of this flavor, but I do have to say, these were definitely the best wings of the afternoon.

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 wings

Water Buffalo
waterbuffalomilwaukee.com
249 N. Water Street
Milwaukee, WI 53202
(414) 431-1133

I've also included an old review written before the blog was started. There was a tragedy in the formative weeks of wing day, and that was the departure of seasoned wingstraordinaire Toby Silverman. To ensure that he would be properly informed I would provide him a brief synopsis of that weeks wingery.

From May 7th, 2008

So, I know this is a bit late, but last week was a wing day for the ages. We had decided on this spot Wingz which is downtown. Turns out it is only open for lunch on Thursday and Friday, and then over the weekend. Also the phone number was disconnected making me wonder if the place was open at all. So upon figuring that out we head to bay view to go to rookies. Now, this place seems like a great sports bar which had the possibility of epic wings, but no, not open either. We then head to another sports bar Jerseys which is down a couple of blocks from Rookies.

Here is where it gets interesting, this place is actually open so we sit down and figure out what to order. This place has the most fucked up wing system known to man. It turns out they have only one type of wing you can order, and then a selection of sauces. Here's the lineup (to the best of my memory) Ranch, Spicy Ranch, Honey Mustard, Creamy Dill, Garlic something, and last but not least salsa and marinara. Now, before I continue, I need to clarify that the salsa and marinara sauce is one sauce. No, not salsa, and another option of marinara, but one little tub with salsa and marinara sauce mixed together. Silverman did not know this when he chose that option. Needless to say he regretted the decision. Another thing that warrants pointing out is that a couple of key sauces are missing, such as buffalo or barbecue for example. At any rate, the wings were absolute shit. And that salsa and marinara, easily the worst wing sauce ever invented.

Because of the disaster at Jerseys, we headed to Girabaldi to get some proper wings so the day would not become an absolute waste.

Side note: When leaving Girabaldi that afternoon, the bartender yelled to us (in a voice reminiscent of the manager in Major League) "Tell the boys at Jersey's we say thanks!!!"

This hell hole: 1 out of 5 wings (two steps away from inedible)

Jerseys Pub & Grill
4024 S Howell Ave
Milwaukee, WI 53207

When worlds collide

2008-05-25T13:43:00.000-07:00

One of the fundamental ground rules of this blog is that all posts must in some way be related to winging. Due to some interesting circumstances that I will explain in a moment, I have a story related to wings that, although incredibly embarrassing and ridiculous, just cannot be kept from the public.

I spent my weekend up in Green Bay WI to see my friends Daniel and Kristin get married, and let me start by saying congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Fuhrmann.

I attended the rehearsal dinner on Friday night, and after the dinner and some celebration at the home of the bride's family I returned to the Howard Johnson to continue the celebration at the hotel bar Hanrahan's. Now, this bar is an Irish themed bar that apparently has a "ladies night" every Friday. Being that this bar is at a random hotel in the outskirts of GB, and that this area is known for some interesting inhabitants, "ladies night" was a bit of a half truth. There were in fact many people who were biologically female, however the term lady is not necessarily one I would use to describe the clientele of this establishment. I was the designated driver this evening so I hadn't gotten to celebrate properly this point, and I was in the mood to really tie one on (shocking) so I begin ordering glasses of vodka on ice. I do have to include a few details, mainly that drink prices at Hanrahan's are insanely cheap, and that being able to "put it on the room's tab" meant that I went from completely sober to unable to walk in under an hour.

It is now about 11:30 and I can have some serious hangovers so I decide to figure out how to get some food. Remember, I have a wedding to get to the next day and I don't want to be dry heaving and sweating all morning. This is what happens if I get too drunk and don't eat anything before passing out. Needless to say, there are no room service options at this particular HoJo. The bartender, affectionately nicknamed Tit-too (she had some really trashy ink on one of her breasts) tells me that Pizza Hut is the only place she can think of that delivers this late. I call said establishment, and order $15 worth of chicken wings ($10 minimum order policy). The person taking the order asks what room to have the food sent to, and I tell her to just send the delivery guy to the bar. I continue drinking, yelling about nothing and having some really interesting conversations with Tit-too. Here is how one priceless conversation went:

Tit-too: "So what do you do?"

Me: "I'm in graduate school to become a doctor!" (I may or may not have been trying to be slightly deceptive with this answer, she didn't look so bad at this point)

Tit-too: "What kind of doctor?"

Me: "An academic doctor, I study economics" (For those reading this who don't know me personally, this is actually true, really)

Tit-too: "What is that? What can you do for my son?"

Me: "Nothing!!!!"

After a few more minutes, and shots of whiskey, my order of wings arrives. I hand the delivery guy a $20 and I announce that I will be retiring to my room. Now, keep in mind that I am sharing this hotel room with my roommate Martin. He has definitely seen me at some of my lower points before, but what I'm about to tell you was able to shock even him. I make my way back to our room, sit down on the bed and start enjoying my order of wings. After maybe two or three wings I have a bit of an epiphany. I realize that I had made a crucial error when packing for this trip, and that the only pair of underwear I had was the pair that I was wearing. Martin is still at the bar, and I figure that I will be done with the wings, and passed out before he gets back. Keep in mind that the wings were delivered at about 12:45. Given my underwear situation, and the fact that I am severely intoxicated, I decide to enjoy these wings naked. Now the rationale for this is as follows; I figure that I can just sleep naked and save 8 hours of underwear use. Then I'll just wear them the next day and get to a wal-mart between the ceremony and reception to deal with this undergarment situation.

So, here I am completely hammered eating some chicken wings naked in a hotel room bed. I am under the covers at least. Well, being that my dexterity is a bit compromised, the eating of said wings is a bit more difficult than expected. Essentially, they are a bit slippery. I end up making an absolute mess of my self dropping wings on the bed repeatedly, and getting red buffalo sauce all over the white sheets on this hotel room bed. I also have wing sauce on my hands, face, and chest. Yes, I even managed to drop a wing on my chest while trying to eat.
I eat half of the order of wings, and decide its about time to get to sleep.

Here is where it really gets terrible. After making an absolute mess of myself, and getting wing sauce all over the sheets I get up to de-sauce myself before I inevitably pass out. Before I continue I do need to remind you of a couple of things;

1) I was completely naked while eating most of these wings
2) I am in front of the sink washing myself in a small hotel room that I am sharing with Martin (he is sleeping on the pull-out couch)
3) I am still naked while getting myself cleaned up
4) Martin is not back from the Honrahan's yet

As I am sure you can imagine, this is quite the recipe for disaster. I am just finishing
the job of getting myself cleaned up and I hear Martin fumbling with the lock. Since he is pretty hammered at this point as well, the fumbling bought me an extra half second or so. Just as Martin is entering the hotel room I make a mad dash for the bed. Martin walks in the room just in time to witness me butt naked, in mid-air diving back into the bed. His first question is why the fuck I am naked, at which point I have to explain my underwear situation, and at that point I have explain the series of events that have led up to this very embarrassing display.

The moral of this story: when drunk and naked, please don't wing and dive.

Club Girabaldi

2008-05-23T15:31:00.000-07:00

This is my first review, but certainly not my first experience with a great wing. What Girabaldi offers is a unique version of a buffalo wing. So far the Wednesday wing team has graced this exclusive club with our presence 2 times (the account of our second trip there will appear in my review of Jersey's). The first involved my brother Toby and I dabbling in what could only be described by the voice of a bartender who smokes 3 packs a day (which Girabaldi has) as "you havin the Nuclear?" Oh weeee had it, and then we HAD it for the rest of the day. Any wing enthusiast that tells you this is an enjoyable experience is a goddamn liar. I've never been so miserable. Not even 18 soft drinks in a row could console my damaged palette. But before he and I did anything that foolish, we mowed down on the truly delicious and amply spicy wings the Club is famous for.
The wings are not breaded, which is a plus to any true wing buff. The sauce is cooked on unlike any other wing I've ever had. My colleagues will tell you that Major Goolsby's is the best wing they've had so far in the city. Tough guys be warned: don't fuck with the nuclear! I gotta hand it to Milwaukee's true wing club: Girabaldi! Tough guys be warned: don't fuck with the nuclear!

4.5/5 wings

There Wing Be Blog

2008-05-23T10:20:00.000-07:00

Welcome, here you will get to enjoy the chronicles of an adventure of discovery, intrigue, an gastronomical ecstasy. One afternoon during the spring of 2008 a select group of gentlemen were enjoying a rousing debate of how to prepare the proper chicken wing. Many issues were introduced concerning how the perfect wing should be prepared. Fried? Breaded? The sauce issues alone proved more difficult of an issue to solve than we had ever imagined. At this moment those of us present for this discussion knew what we had to do. We had received a wake up call that would forever change Wednesday afternoons for ever.

Wing Day!

We decided at that moment that every Wednesday would be dedicated to finding the best wings Milwaukee had to offer. The journey has proved to be more difficult than ever imagined, therefore we have decided to use the powers of the interweb to document the adventure of a lifetime.